Meeting My East and My West

Making a move from Sri Lanka where I was for the last 27 years enjoying the warm weather, the social life and meaningful work,  also dealing with the challenges of a brutal war around us, yet feeling as we were living our life on the edge and to its fullest, was not an easy one.

We chose Ottawa, a smaller city, accessible, nice people and the beauty of nature, yet making a move at my age of 52 is challenging.   Then again, my father was 57 when he and my mother immigrated with us to Toronto in 1973 from a hillside Sri Lankan town of Kandy and what a transformation that was.  We lived truly in another world then, without even a telephone or TV in our home and they made a good life here.    So, this move with my family is less of a culture shock.

Yet, four months hence and as the days get colder and shorter I am being mindful and aware of what is going on within me - my mind and body - to cope with this change not only for me but for Samantha and our four children who are new to Canada.    I have not mourned for what I left behind as I am focussed on the future, creating my new life and for that I feel the strain, but I have to keep my balance, as I could easily fall into despair in these dark cold days.

The Road Less Travelled

 As an entrepreneur and a self starter – I took the Road Not Taken like Robert Frost did - it is even more daunting as I have to set about my business to sell myself.  Packaging 27 years of diverse experiences into a business of leadership, spirituality and sustainability needs me to be creative and ingenious.   

Yet, to endure is second nature for me having lived through the traumas of war and always finding my own path.   When doubts and fears arise, I ask myself, what is the worst that could happen?.    That puts things in perspective.  

Having grown up with the teachings of the Buddha, I accept that life is suffering and he gave us a path to end this suffering and I am guided by it.   Buddha also said not to take what he said at face value.  He urged us to inquire, question and experience it ourselves. 

My inquiring mind takes me to many other sages and teachers from the East and the West, from Socrates to Krishnamurti to Osho to Aquinas to the modern day Pinker and I realize it is a lifetime of learning, while living a life in the middle path. 

I am grateful and inspired by my teachers, one being Wendy Palmer who opened a new world for me through Conscious Embodiment at what was then the Shambhala Summer Institute in Halifax.  I endeavour to live by the four poles, standing on my integrity, as honesty is the best policy; to the right, generosity to give of my time and to be of service without expectations; to the left, to be gracious, to appreciate all I have; and to the top, my dignity, as when I ensure the other’s dignity is intact, so is mine.

The Power of Balance - The Rituals

My practice is steeped in ritual to help keep me centered as my new life unfolds, as I realize if I magnify any one of the doubts and fears that arise, I will succumb. 

The ritual begins in the morning as I awake with deep breaths and ankle rolls, getting the system oxygenated for the dawn of a new day.  Then I do a Reiki affirmation calling out to the Abundant Universe to seek guidance for the new day, the new challenges to navigate through the trials and tribulations, so I can be balanced and centered, putting things in perspective.    I then wish everyone I know and all beings to be well and happy and an offer of gratitude to my health and well being, the love I have and the people around me and for the opportunities abound.

Then I sit cross-legged for a Buddhist meditation - Ana Pana Sati, following my breath and end with a chanting for the Chakras and feel the joy of being aligned and at peace. 

Now I am ready for some physical exercise to fill my lungs with air and my blood with endorphins - yoga stretches, sit ups, push ups, pull ups and a few days of the week, a run or a bike ride even as it gets colder, often thinking about the warm ocean swims I used to have.  All this requires an hour, sometimes I indulge with two and when I am in a real rush, 30 minutes helps me to be ready for the day.

Breakfast with fruits and oats gives me the foundation for the unpredictable rest of the day.

Throughout the day, I strive to stay mindful with bare attention, being aware of my mind and body as I meet the external challenges of the day.   I end the day with a meditative focus and a reflection, again appreciating and being thankful for all that was brought me closer to my goal and in expectation of even a better day tomorrow.

Being centered allows me to put things in perspective, deal better with rejection or postponement of decisions, people not responding or offering me a chance, not to magnify the negative and let it overcome me with fear, as I am grateful for what I already have.  Fear arises when I think about the future as I realize, money is important as a means to live, especially in Canada where there is little give, so I honour its place in my constellation. 

So, when fear arises I follow Wendy’s advice,  I inhale up through the top of my head toward the sky reaching to the stars and then a long exhale imagining my breath going through me to the core of this earth to feel secure in being anchored between heaven and earth in a stable and dignified posture.  Concentrating on my breath for a few moments, I feel supported by the energy around me and feel centered.

Finding My Place Here

To be centered is to be creative, for I leave no stone unturned in my quest to finding this good work, listening to the wisdom of many, making new friends, understanding the subtleties of Canadian culture, relearning what I may have known when I lived here and to slowly realize and gain confidence that I do have something to contribute.   

So interesting the contrasts - we stand close to talk to each other in the East and an endearing touch even maybe an invasion of space here; being curious, open and provocative as we are in the East maybe politically incorrect here; my different words, accent and a nod ‘yes-maybe’ from my head may confuse here, so every day I learn by listening and seeing trying to understand the subtle nuances as I align back with the culture here, not to lose my soul, but to connect in a comfortable middle.  

Yet I am heartened to see in Canada, the East and the West are meeting halfway between the extremes of materialism and spiritualism; determinism and free will; individualism and communalism and I feel I could not have moved here at a better time than now.

The bi-cultural me is a bridge builder and in my work, I thrive in sharing my learning to inspire others, especially those who seem paralyzed by the material world’s need for control.  I engage and co-inquire to seek deeper knowledge of the universal wisdom through our intuition.   .... and we begin with our breath...   

The man from the East, with his faith in the eternal who in his soul had met the touch of the Supreme Person – did he never come to you in the West and speak to you in the Kingdom of Heaven?.  Did he not unite the East and the West in truth, in the unity of one spiritual bond between all children of the Immortal, in the realization of one great Personality in all human persons?.  Rabindranath Tagore – Creative Unity

Lalith Gunaratne

Ottawa, Canada

25^th December 2011